Oh hey, it's 1:30 am. FYI, I am no longer a fan of you.
I remember when this particular time on the old clock meant closing tiiiiiime, one last call for alcohol so finish your whisky or beeeeer. In light of the fact that I've been up at 11pm, midnight, and 12:45 so far tonight, 1:30 just equals sleep isn't going to happen so I'm gonna work on my blog while stalking the baby video monitor and OH GOD her arm just moved why is she not sleeping should I go and rock/hold/swaddle/pat her what do I do someone just TELL ME THE ANSWER!?!
I'll be in bed by 7:30 tonight. I can teach you how to be 80 years old, too, if you want!
Yo, 7:00 am. I'm not a huge fan of you either, but at least there's coffee.
"Bad news, we don't have anymore coffee"
- husband who forgot to check the pantry before momentarily shattering my world
I just read an article about new-parent sleep deprivation and how continued lack of sleep can cause a postpartum woman to be as cognitively impaired as an intoxicated person. Thankfully this totally explains why I looked straight in the mirror just now and mascara'd my eyebrow.
I think I'd get more sleep if I just had some solid answers, you know? Like, how do I know if she's truly hungry when she wakes up multiple times a night, or if she just needs some comforting? How do I avoid all the worst sleep-inducing habits when they are the things actually working? How do I get my husband to stop waking up in a panic wondering where we put the baby (hahahahahaha, dude, you were so freaked out last night)?
I mean, when I Google "how to get baby to sleep through the night" I expect a step-by-step tutorial, internet people. You better quit telling me to cry it out and hope for the best. I will paper cut you.
Ohhh, 3:00 pm, is it bedtime yet? Nope. But dinner's on the horizon and I just...so tired!
So here's what we're going to do. It may be late afternoon, but today begs for the crock pot.
Tonight's dinner recipe is pretty handy in that you can still rely on your slow-cooker to do all the work, but you don't have to think about dinner prep until later in the day. You know, after you've had a chance to drink a vat of coffee and wipe the mascara off your eyebrows.
And there are only a few ingredients! And almost no pre-cooking! Slice up some onions and potatoes, layer them with some baby carrots straight from the bag, brown up a few chicken breasts for, like, 2 seconds, and place it all in your crock pot with some chicken broth and wine.
Another plus? It's late enough in the day that sneaking a few glugs of wine straight from the bottle as you "cook" is totally ok. And if you get a little tipsy, well, just blame it on 1:30 am.
Crock Pot Chicken
Carrots and Potatoes
Adapted from Cooking Light
1 yellow onion, vertically sliced
2 c baby carrots
6 red potatoes, cut into 1/4-inch slices
1/2 c fat-free, low-sodium chicken broth
1/2 c dry white wine
1 tbs honey mustard
1 tbs honey mustard
1 tbs fresh thyme, chopped
2 cloves garlic, chopped
1 tsp paprika
1 lb boneless, skinless chicken breasts
1 tsp extra virgin olive oil
Coat the bottom of your crock pot with cooking spray. Arrange the onion slices in an even layer across the bottom, and then top with the carrots and potatoes.
Combine the broth, wine, honey mustard, thyme, garlic, and desired amount of salt/pepper in a small bowl or a measuring cup. Pour over the vegetables in the crock pot.
Combine the paprika and additional salt/pepper, and rub evenly over the chicken. Heat a large skillet over medium-high heat, and add the oil. When hot, add the chicken and cook 3 minutes per side or until browned. Arrange the chicken on top of the vegetables in the crock pot.
Cover and cook on low for 3 and 1/2 hours, or until the chicken is done and the vegetables are tender. Garnish with additional thyme as desired.